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Find
an attractive prisoner of war,
bring her home, shave her head,
trim her nails, and give her new
clothes. Then, she's yours.
(Deuteronomy 21:11-13)

Find a man with seven daughters
and impress him by watering his
flock. -- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)

Purchase a piece of property and
get a woman as part of the deal.
-- Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)
Go to a party and hide. When
the women come out to dance,
grab one and carry her off to be
your wife. -- Benjaminites
(Judges 21:19-25)

Have God create a wife for you
while you sleep. Note: this
will cost you a rib. -- Adam
(Genesis 2:19-24) [Adam is the
only man that ever went to sleep
single and woke up married.]

Agree to work seven years in
exchange for a woman's hand in
marriage. Get tricked into
marrying the wrong woman. Then,
work another seven years for the
woman you wanted to marry in the
first place. That's right.
Fourteen years of toil for a
woman. -- Jacob (Genesis
29:15-30)

Cut off 200 foreskins off of
your future father-in-law's
enemies and get his daughter for
a wife. -- David (I Samuel
18:27)

Even if no one is out there,
just wander around a bit and
you'll definitely find someone.
(It's all relative of course.)
-- Cain (Genesis 4:16-17)

Become the emperor of a huge
nation and hold a beauty
contest. -- Xerxes or Ahasuerus
(Esther 2:3-4)
When you see someone you like,
go home and tell your parents,
"I have seen a ... woman; now
get her for me." If your
parents question your decision,
simply say, "Get her for me.
She's the one for me." -- Samson
(Judges 14:1-3)

Kill any husband and take HIS
wife. (Prepare to lose four
sons though). -- David (2 Samuel
11)
 
Wait for your brother to die.
Take his widow. (It's not just
a good idea, it's the law.) --
Onan and Boaz (Deuteronomy or
Leviticus, example in Ruth)

Don't be so picky. Make up for
quality with quantity. --
Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3)

A wife? ... NOT!!! -- Paul (1
Corinthians 7:32-35)
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